Ask Coach KFos: Don't Settle for a Booty Call - Kelsey Foster

Ask Coach KFos: Don’t Settle for a Booty Call

by Kelsey on April 19, 2013

This week’s Ask Coach KFos: If You Want a Relationship Don’t Settle for being a Booty Call

Kelsey Foster Relationship Advice
“I have gone on a couple of dates with a guy I really like. He has said he’s not looking for a serious relationship right now but he’s texted me late at night suggesting I come ‘hang out’ so I’m pretty sure he’s attracted to me. Thing is, I really want a boyfriend. Do you think guys just *say* they don’t want a relationship but once they realize there is a great connection they change their mind? Or maybe they just say that because they are afraid of getting hurt? I’m really attracted to him and we have a lot of laughs together. Part of me is really tempted to say yes to his next late night text. Help!”

Dear Booty Call(me)Maybe:

If someone tells you they don’t want a relationship, BELIEVE THEM. Whether it’s because they don’t want a relationship with you or they fancy themselves to be some kind of bachelor-playboy… it doesn’t matter. No amount of sexting, push-up bras, or mind-blowing sexual prowess is going to change their mind. If you want a boyfriend don’t settle for being a booty call.

Settling for less than what you want is not only not fair to yourself and it’s really not fair to him. If you sleep with him hoping he’ll change his mind and want to be your boyfriend, you are being manipulative. And that’s not cool. He’s been up front with you – he doesn’t want you as his girlfriend but he will sleep with you. That doesn’t make him a dog; it actually makes him pretty honest.

Save yourself the frustration and heartache, put this guy in the platonic friends category and focus your energy on someone who wants to be in a relationship. And make this your new mantra: I want a boyfriend and I won’t settle for being a booty call!

Do you have a question for me? Shoot me an email at kelsey@kelseyfoster.com and you might be featured on an upcoming Ask Coach KFos!

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