Dating Advice for Women

Ask Coach KFos: Family Member Overboard!

by Kelsey on March 26, 2013

This week’s question: Is my family member going overboard with communicating?

AskCoach
I have a family member who went on a date with a guy who she really really reeeeeaaallllly likes. So much so, that in the days right after the date, she texted him a few times, tried calling him, sent him a friend request on Facebook, and probably drove by his house a few times (j/k…sorta). Last I heard, he hadn’t responded to her. I tried to tell her she was going a little overboard but wasn’t sure if that was my place. What do you think about the situation?

Dear Family-Member-Overboard:

Wow. She really likes him you say? 🙂 Okay, here is the brutal truth…she has likely scared him into the witness protection program at this point. She should IMMEDIATELY STOP trying to reach out to him. He knows how to find her, and if he wants to, he will. Although my guess is she might just have to chalk this up to a “learning lesson” and move on from hoping to go out with him again.

For future dates and guys she likes (yes, she will find someone else she’s interested in), here is how she should handle things. ONE text, email or phone call to say thank you for the nice time the day after the date if the guy paid. That’s it. I actually recommend a text or email since she can simply say thank you. Then she should put all communications devices away and let him take the lead in more conversation and suggestions for future dates.

Yes, some people say women can ask a guy out and take the lead regarding dating these days. I happen to believe in a more traditional scenario, letting the man put forth the effort and court a woman he likes. And guys who might be reading this? If you are on a date with a lady and you think you’d like to go out again, ASK for the second date during the first date. That just makes it easier on everyone!

Do you have a question for me? Shoot me an email at kelsey@kelseyfoster.com and you might be featured on an upcoming Ask Coach KFos!

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